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Friday, December 16, 2011

A big oops???

When Lydia was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, I was told that I should be grateful and thankful that is was diabetes and not something worse.  I took that advice to heart and clung to it on my bad "I hate diabetes" days.  I even told my children this very thing and shared it with others as well.  Today, I wonder if I was wrong.  I don't feel happy and grateful that the kids "only" have diabetes.  I know my kids are thankful and grateful either.

Lydia has been struggling with her diabetes for quite a while now.  We see a therapist several times a month.  Today as I sat in the room and talked with the therapist it just kinda hit me.  Sure, there are worse things but, isn't this bad enough?  I have watched this sweet child of mine struggle so much lately.  She hates life because of her diabetes.  So much so, that we almost lost her in August.  I have watched this happy, outgoing girl become someone who hates to go to school, doesn't want to deal with people who don't understand, is so unhappy it breaks my heart.  No, I don't think I need to be thankful or grateful that my children "only" have diabetes.  I am sorry for the times I have passed this advice on.

Thanks for letting me rant ... a broken hearted Momma.

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